In The News

The Coronation of Queen Hillary to Begin Sunday

Queen Hillary
Image Courtesy: Molli Nickell

The people have been so informed that the future Queen of America will announce her path to succession this Sunday.

Ah, the beautiful ceremony a royal crowning is to behold.

It is the pomp: props, decorations, music and the plumage – all so that the little people can rejoice in the coronation of their next Queen – Her majesty, Queen Hillary – direct heir to the throne of His Majesty, King Barack. The announcement cements the pre-determined succession of one royal leader to the next and begins the 18 month long journey the successor must take on her journey to become America’s next monarch.

The Republican candidates headed into the 2016 primary are many and varied, but the Democrat leadership chooses its candidates for their consituents – do they not believe that the common folk can choose the best candidate for the general election on their own?

The DNC will likely push some ill-fated, no-chance alternative to Hillary like V.P. Joe Biden,  Sen. Bernie Saders or Gov. Martin O’Malley just to show that the chosen one had earned her crown by battling it out against serious competition… or something.

The Republicans will have a cadre of suitors battling it out in debates and the media ensuring that the survivor emerges with blood, egg and stench on them while our future Queen steps forward unblemished and victorious having won against a clearly inferior challenger.

Her Majesty’s campaign has a set of guiding principles. Every guideline seems to scream “we know we’re going to get the nomination, but we just can’t act like it.” According to Fox News, the memo states the following:

“We Are Hillary For America.”

to give every family, every small business, and every American a path to lasting prosperity by electing Hillary Clinton the next President of the United States.”

“This campaign is not about Hillary Clinton and not about us — it’s about the everyday Americans who are trying to build a better life for themselves and their families,” the memo says

The memo concludes with a series of guiding principles that include:

“We are disciplined: driven every day by strategy, not tactics or one offs. We know there will be tough days, but we will bounce back and get back to work. We take risks, always measuring with empirical data to establish best practices.”

“We are humble: we take nothing for granted, we are never afraid to lose, we always out-compete and fight for every vote we can win. We know this campaign will be won on the ground, in states.”

“We are responsible: we always remember and appreciate the generosity of millions of people who invest their time and resources in Hillary Clinton and in us.”

It ends by telling recipients: “We are guided by Hillary’s bedrock values of hard work, service, fairness, and faith in the American Dream.”

The people certainly wish to understand this Royal Proclamation so we attempt some clarity:

Queen Hillary seeks to “give every family, every small business, and every American a path to lasting prosperity.”

Do most Americans look to their leadership to show them how they should make a living?

Americans used to expect the government to simply defend them, regulate inter-state trade, deal with foreign trade and resolve inter-state disagreements. Assuming that Americans want their leader to “give” them the path to prosperity assumes that the people are unable to make it on their own.

In return, Her Majesty only asks that Americans give her the crown that she so believes is rightly hers.

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Rich Mitchell

Rich Mitchell is the editor-in-chief of Conservative Daily News and the president of Bald Eagle Media, LLC. His posts may contain opinions that are his own and are not necessarily shared by Bald Eagle Media, CDN, staff or .. much of anyone else. Find him on twitter, facebook and

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  1. And of course, the MSM along with the DNC will expound upon us the need for the first woman president just like they did about the first black president, and over the last six years we have seen how that turned out. We need a president, and gender or ethnicity makes no difference as long as that person is pro American and United States of America oriented. Hillary, Biden, and Sanders do not fit in that category. We know that we will survive the Obama administration, the real question should be, why do we need a Hillary administration to survive from too?

  2. Good job, old chap! Didn’t realize you had that satirical side. Will save and reference when I need to laugh to keep from crying….which may be frequently this next 18 months.

      1. Thanx!! Not sure how I missed it….but sure clears up a couple of things. I’ve been trying to figure how all of those ugly irregular paving stones got thrown on my lawn. I decided to use a sledge hammer to break them up & toss in my rock garden, but the darn things were made of such inferior chalky material they were just dust that is still fouling up the hot air that seems to blow nonstop. We have some potash plants making fertilizer and even they rejected them. Guess if enough are interested, we can at least start filling the potholes in 2016

  3. Informed Americans it’s time to take a knee and pray even if your not religious,take a knee and think back to a pleasant time a time when Ronald Reagan made Us feel proud to be American after a peanut farmer brought the country to its lowest depths and remember never in a million years would America vote for a muslim socialist with a proven track record of hatred for America,and yet Americans with shame in their eyes for living in a country that prospered from slavery went to the booths 2 times and voted for a tyrant ,For a dictator dictator who’s hatred for America is on display every single day and yet has a 47 percent approval rating.Get on your knees and pray Informed ones,because I see shame in Americans eyes shame that America has never had a women president.If the independents and republicans decide to stay at home like they did with Romney you will be on your knees not praying but bowing to the new queen.

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