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Lemonade Concessioneers to Unionize Due to ‘Big Mean Government’

Young lemonade stand owners across America have been the subject of government witch hunts for the last few months.

Local governments have been shutting down stands owned by children trying to make a little extra summer cash to pay for pet food, toys and trips to amusement parks. The government crack-down has all but dashed those hopes.

Now, the youthful concessioneers are fighting back. The Lemonade Makers And Operators (LMAO) union is being formed to protect the rights of the pre-pubescent entrepreneurs.

Watching the government attack Boeing and now guitar makers that are either not unionized or have decided to operate a factory in a right-to-work state, the young business owners have figured out that going union has advantages. Little Bobby McAdams said, “I just wanted to save up some money to go to Coaster World, now I have to join a union just to make a buck? Nine more years you mean democrats.. then I can vote!”

Susie Craven told CDNews that she had no choice but to join the union because “Big government is really, really big and stuff. I can’t even vote, but if my union dues being funneled to a few democrats will get them off my back so I can feed my hamster – fine, sign me up!”

this post is fiction, children aren’t really unionizing – it’s an exaggeration to prove a point .. or two.

Rich Mitchell is the Sr. Managing Editor of Conservative Daily News. His posts may contain opinions that are his own and are not necessarily shared by Anomalous Media, CDN, staff or .. much of anyone else. Find him on twitter, facebook and google+

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  1. WillofLa says:

    My question is, when are the city governments going to demand that “garage sales” operators get permits to make these sales? See, the city would get their share of the profits first before the homeowner would make a dime, if they made any money at all. My wife and I lived out in the country at one time in a subdivision. At one point we had a car port sale every weekend for about three months. It was a pain at first but once we got up a system then we had fun at it. The most we ever made was about $65. That may not be much, but we didn’t do it to make money, we did it to get rid of stuff, and make a little mad money. We ran ours different from some people in that we would open early and close about five o’clock so that it would be open as long as possible. But when we moved into the city we found out the hard way that there were laws about holding these things inside city limits that didn’t exist out in the parish(county). We found out that you couldn’t hold a car port sale more than three weekends a year! Three car port sales a year? Man, that sounded like something the people should be making decisions about and not the city government, but we adhered anyway after we had held a car port sale for three weekends in a row and had exceeded the limit quite a bit. We found out that one of our neighbors had turned us in to the city. That’s when we got a nasty letter from the city about it and were told that we had been “red flagged”. If we wanted to hold another one, even according to the limit law, we would have to have a permit since we were considered to be a “habitual violator’s”! Imagine that? I didn’t know we were being turned in by our neighbors in this new neighborhood we thought was made up of nice people.

    But I helped my son and his friends build a lemonaid stand and bought them lemon mix and styrofoam cups, and helped haul the ice up to the corner and get them set up for the first couple of times. After that we would just go buy ice when they needed it. They had a blast, and believe it or not they made over a hundred dollars the first day!! I couldn’t believe it. I thought that maybe when they got tired of doing it, I might take over and work it. I wanted a hundred dollars! I’d love to have an extra hundred dollars! And for just a few hours in the shade waiting for someone to stop and buy a cup? You bet. But no one from the city came by and told us there were any laws, not like the damn car port sales had at least.