Why I Love Barack Obama

I’ve received complaints about being too hard on President Obama, since he is an exceptionally nice guy, likable, kind-hearted, and well-intentioned to boot.

So let me do my best to fashion a love letter to Barack Obama, the way the majority of Americans would have it.

Barack, I love that you always follow through with your promises. Like closing Guantanamo Bay, ending extraordinary rendition, terminating the “war on terror” (even though you are fighting for the indefinite detention provision of NDAA), not using drones to kill innocent women and children, and not unconstitutionally declaring wars against foreign countries like Libya.

I love how you respond to foreign policy crises with skill and aplomb. Like how you visit the countries of our closest allies, for example Israel, and not insult our relationship with Britain by giving their heads of state cheesy gifts, or returning cherished gifts to them, not bowing to foreign heads of state, not blaming others for our embassies getting stormed, or giving foreign aid to nations run by terrorist groups that want to destroy Israel. I love how you schmooze with dictators and have a blame America first instinct.

I love how you play golf, skip more than half of intelligence meetings, leak our intel secrets to make yourself look good, claim credit for the Seals’ killing of bin laden over and over again, use the word “I” repeatedly, stammer constantly, can’t give a speech without a teleprompter, make a big deal out of your NCAA brackets, go on Letterman and hobnob with celebrities when you should be doing other things, skip out on jobs briefings for months on end… I love it all. And I love you.

I love how the tides have lowered, race relations have healed, and our entire country is making “progress” while being fundamentally transformed. I love how you say that we are in a recovery when part-time jobs are taking the place of full-time ones, your administration has netted only 100,000 jobs, and the middle class bled over 40% of its wealth. I love how we are at 8% or more unemployment for 43 months and you claim that as a success. Not to mention real unemployment is something like 20%. You saved us from 50% unemployment and a 100% loss of wealth. Like you said, “you didn’t build that.” Thanks for humbling us.

I used to be a fool, thinking that I loved America as it was founded. Constitutionally limited government, liberty, and free market prosperity. I loved that we used to declare wars only when they were declared on us, way back before the progressive era. I loved that we were respected for being the land of the free and the home of the brave.

But now I see that was all wrong. I loved a lie.

I love Barack Obama.

Author’s Note: For most of the documentation to these claims, see here.