Pirates Rights

We hear so much today about rights. I want my rights. He wants his rights. They want their rights. Everybody wants what’s coming to them. These “rights snatchers” have several things in common. Their most distinctive common thread is thin skin, they are easily offended, and they are often minorities.

Illegal aliens from Mexico, are the darling minority and heart throb of the news media. They want their rights too. But it’s not like their basic human rights in this country are being violated. They have the right to life. No illegal alien can be indiscriminately killed at the whim of any other illegal or legal citizen. All would agree that even illegal aliens have a right to live, but other than this basic right, what rights should be granted to lawbreakers? The rub comes in when they claim, as a right, something that should be an earned privilege for legal citizens, such as certain government benefits, or the legal right to drive a vehicle, or constitutional rights, etc., which SHOULD BE RESERVED FOR LAW ABIDING CITIZENS. Where, oh where, is common sense?

They are breaking the immigration laws of this country by arriving and remaining here illegally. Regardless of their reason for coming, the issue of legality must remain paramount. If the debate gets sidetracked as to why they came here, or that they have family here and cannot be separated, then emotion begins to rule and feelings dictate how they must be dealt with. When laws are not enforced, then authority is destroyed, and when there is no authority, situational ethics become the authority, which means laws are written in Jell-O. Apparently our immigration laws are as firm as lemon Jell-O. Notice, the color of lemon is yellow.

So not only are illegal aliens breaking the law, they are flaunting their criminality in arrogance, demanding to receive more than hard working, lifelong citizens, who have paid their dues. They also have the gall to be “offended” when called on the carpet. Now, all the old guard career offendees, led by Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton, have to battle just to get in line and be heard, since new minorities are jockeying to be heard with their list of offenses. Blacks are offended at the Confederate flag, undocumented Mexicans are offended because they are called illegal aliens, Muslims are offended because someone points out that terrorists are, coincidentally, Muslim, American Indians are mad because some sports team is named the Braves. You get the picture.

Well, fair is fair. I’m here to proclaim the rights of a downtrodden group who have never had a voice; a group in history who had the unfortunate luck to live before the days of political correctness and liberalism, otherwise, they could have bellied up to the bar of offense and ordered their drink of reparation. I am speaking of pirates. I’m not talking about modern day sissy pirates who make and sell CD’s and DVD’s illegally. They wouldn’t last two seconds under Captain Kidd. I’m talking about swashbuckling, rope swinging, ship burning, booty stealing, brawling pirates. Historically, I believe pirates have been misunderstood. I know that pirates murdered, committed pillage and rape, and stole, but they should be granted amnesty. You have got to be compassionate and understand their background and condition. After being cooped up on a ship with a bunch of smelly men, all walking around and saying “Arrrrrgh”, for months at a time, you would rob and plunder too. Besides, who are you to deny someone of making a living?

How can anyone sit in judgment of pirates? So they pushed the legal envelope. They only did what they had to do to make a living. Murder, stealing, and destroying property were all just part of the job description. It’s what they did, not who they were. I’m sure most pirates were decent, patriotic, God fearing, family loving, hardworking (you ever tried loading a cannon ball?) people who wanted to better themselves.

Pirates have gotten a bad rap. They are belittled in today’s society. Now days, no little boy wants to grow up and be a pirate. They only want to play pirate in their childhood. And it is a slap in the face to name a ball team the Pirates, or Buccaneers. Imagine the outrage if you heard of such teams as the Tacoma Terrorists, Minnesota Muslims, Annapolis Arabs, Mighty Mexicans, or New York Negroes. We would never hear the end of it. But no one ever speaks up for the minority group of pirates when they are mocked and ridiculed.

If you are a pirate or descended from piratage, then you may consider joining C.A.P.R., the Council on American Pirate Relations, for a fair representation. And hurry! The other minorities are winning at the present.

Joseph Harris has been a college professor and pastor since 1987 and his writings have appeared on WND, Sword of the Lord, Intellectual Conservative, Conservative Daily News, Canada Free Press, Land of the Free, and The Post Chronicle. joey@headricks.com

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