Bigoted, Racist, No-Good, Evil Conservatives and the Leftists Who Need Them

All those who dabble in the dark arts of conservatism are called bigots, racists, sexists, homophobes or just plain evil in the course of exchanging pleasantries with the left. So why not just own it?

Fine, I’m a bigot, a racist, a sexist and a homophobe, according to a warped left-wing worldview that casts all those who oppose government redistribution as oppressors of blacks, immigrants, gays and women.

Obviously, any wingnut’s confession of guilt for the litany of sins charged by his fork-tongued adversaries is tongue-in-cheek. The question is: do progressives who project such a nefarious psyche onto their ideological opponents really believe the nonsense they’re spouting? In other words, are lefties getting high on their own supply?

There are two kinds of people who believe the tripe that conservatives are racist misogynistic knuckle-draggers: the uncritical soft left, who suckle at the sour teats of MSNBC and CBS News, Huffington Post or Yahoo News; and the Marxist, Castroite left, whose ideological framework necessarily casts their opponents in the mold of bigots, racists and women-oppressors.

But let’s leave aside the flotsam and jetsam who float idly on the neomarxist cultural tide and concentrate on the ideological leadership. Why do the Ivy league set say the right is full of closet Klan members aching for a return to the ‘good old days’ when a fella could whimsically rape and abuse women in public, force them to carry babies to term, and then burn any as witches who so much think about asking for child support?

The left needs the right. In a zero-sum world where the poor are necessarily impoverished by the rich, the minority are necessarily oppressed by the majority, and physically weaker women are the prey of physically stronger men, then there is no other explanation for someone opposing the left’s equalization of life’s injustice than being prejudiced.

That’s why if you oppose Barack Obama’s quixotic brand of value redistribution, then you must be a heartless racist! That’s why if you think the Lily Ledbetter act is a condescending piece of legislation that neglects the market’s punishment of idiots who don’t recompense for value because of anti-vagina bias, then you sir, are a mysogynist. And that’s why if you believe that immigrants must at least pay tributary acknowledgment of our rule of law and our system of government, then you must be a xenophobe.

In order to cast themselves as heroes of their own passion play righting the wrongs of cosmic injustice, progressives need villains. It’s not enough to yell, Lieutenant-Danlike, in front of an ungodly hurricane, “Come and get me, you son of a bitch!” — one has to cast other human beings as somehow responsible for the gargantuan storm.

Never mind that any hurricane possesses the combined force of several million nuclear bombs; in order to stop these catastrophic acts of Nature, people just need to stop breathing. It’s the progressive version of “original sin,” born of a post-religious worldview that takes all the worst aspects of Christianic faith and throws in the non-redeeming value of eschewing God.

But underlying this point-of-view is the true irony: it casts all members of a given class of people (sound familiar?) as inherently needing of progressives’ help. Women truly are needing of all sorts of government protections; lest the marketplace would have them all in sweatshops. Blacks need housing projects or even better, redlining legislation; or else greedy bankers would win out (by not making money on mortgages, apparently). If humans are allowed to go about their business making stuff without progressives putting a halt to it, the planet will be poisoned and all life on earth will end as we know it.

Not to mention that according to taxpayer-funded NPR, if you plan on voting for the mildly pro-market Romney/Ryan, then just put your check on the “white supremacist ticket“…

The conservative’s answer to the left on matters of economic justice is that consumers, laborers and businesses are held accountable for their decisions every day, as voted on in dollars. People don’t need biased, self-interested progressives rigging the system for themselves or for crony corporations or for unions. Right-wingers would rather have the maximum amount of economic power in their own hands; and no, they don’t believe working for or buying products from corporations is an act of exploitation. On the other side of the “corporate exploitation” equation are the consumers that derive benefit from their goods and services.

The progressive worldview is a paternalistic breed of racism and sexism that projects its biases onto those who oppose them on principled grounds. Conservatives don’t believe in ever-expansive, redistributive government, period. They don’t think people need it, in general, because there is enough equality in society among the great majority that if the marketplace is unleashed, people will have more than enough opportunities to triumph over adversity, making themselves and their country better in the process.

The conservative, therefore, is decidedly unbiased. Individuals can make it if the government’s big black boots of taxation, regulation, and redistribution are taken off their throats. Welfare and unemployment suppress human development; they represent the opposite of the kind of self-empowerment conservatives want to see for all citizens.

The conservative worldview is one where people are potential winners and not all tragedies in life can be prevented, only tempered through personally given charity and love; lest we empower a government that will cause more systematic and widespread tragedy through tyranny.