Scorned Alabama Crimson Tide Now on Mission to Destroy NCAA With Extreme Prejudice

It is never advisable yank on a tiger’s tale or step on Superman’s cape yet that is what those who are tasked with the weekly NCAA college football power rankings did on Sunday.

The Alabama Crimson Tide, fresh off of a 66-3 bludgeoning of Ole Miss were somehow bumped down to the second rated team in the country behind Clemson.

It was a trendy pick given the reigning champions 5-0 record after the loss of several players to the NFL including star quarterback DeShaun Watson but it was a disrespectful gesture toward a Crimson Tide dynasty that if not for Watson’s late heroics, would be shooting for a third title in a row.

How this accomplishes anything but piss off a team that is looking to crush everyone in their path is lost on the pollsters who can now watch the juggernaut in action until whatever remains of Alabama’s opponent in Atlanta next January has to be picked out of the turf at Mercedez-Benz Stadium.

The remaining schedule for the Tide is as follows:

Sat, Oct 7 @ Texas A&M: 4-1 Aggies probably the biggest challenge on schedule but Alabama should be royally pissed by the time they take the field in College Station in the first game after their ratings snub.

Sat, Oct 14 vs Arkansas: Facing a mediocre team at home should be an easy workday for the Tide.

Sat, Oct 21 vs Tennessee: See above.

Sat, Nov 4 vs LSU: Once a great rivalry but LSU just lost at home to freaking Troy. Roll Tide!

Sat, Nov 11 @Miss St: Intriguing matchup but after big win against LSU, Bulldogs have struggled. Should be no match for Crimson Tide.

Sat, Nov 18 vs Mercer: This could be the game where the all-time record for points scored by the Crimson Tide is shattered.

Sat, Nov 25 @ Auburn: Traditional rivalry but barring a miracle like that 2013 last second return of a missed field goal for a touchdown, Alabama wins the Iron Bowl going away.

SEC Championship Game: Georgia is currently unbeaten and could stay that way but won’t be able to match up with Bama in a big game like this.

NCAA Playoffs: Likely opponents are chokers from mediocre conferences like Ohio State and Washington, perhaps Clemson can give them a run for their money but barely won last year with a better team.

NCAA Championship Game: Don’t look for another letdown again this year.

Alabama RUNS THE TABLE and gets the dynasty back on track.