The terrorist community was exuberant that Obama will be back to provide more weapons-trafficking in the Middle East. Above is a photo of a Libyan militia member flashing the victory signal to the president.

Russian strongman Vladimir Putin wept tears of joy that America’s most flexible president will be returning to compromise on missile defense, unilateral nuclear disarmament, and other international issues.

Venezuelan dictator Hugo Chavez joined fellow Obama-endorser Vladimir Putin in giving a shout out to President Obama for his victory.

President Obama took a bow before the Saudi Prince for running a brilliant campaign based on Big Bird, Mitt hates cookies, binders full of women, and horses and bayonets.

African Americans for Obama proclaimed the end of racism by tweeting “f*ck white people.”

Key Obama campaigner Beyonce Knowles tweeted out “Take that Mitches.” There’s no word if Jay-Z celebrated with another rendition of “99 Problems and Mitt Ain’t One.”

Bits of protoplasm often mistaken for human beings partied at the idea of re-electing a president who supports their arbitrary termination.

Children cried with joy at the thought of their debt burden skyrocketing over $200,000 per person for their age group.

Mother Gaia gave an official press announcement thanking Obama for restoring rightful control over the earth’s climate to unelected bureaucrats in Washington.

The devil was ecstatic over the election of a party that voted twice to remove God from its platform (before being overruled, of course).

Baby vampire bats smiled approvingly at the Democrat voters who returned Obama to power.

Now, I have no idea what Secretary Clinton saw on her Blackberry (and can you believe she found via her cell phone?), but I did notice how careful she was to tell everyone in the room that the news was “unconfirmed”.  For all we know, it WAS confirmed, but she was trying to keep the release of information under control.  Or maybe it really was unconfirmed, and she was still trying to keep the release of information under control.  Either way, it’s very interesting to see a politician’s response to such a major event.  Also… I believe somebody that many of you will “know” made a cameo in that video.  Bonus points to anyone (who’s not a writer at this website) who tells us who made that cameo in the comments below.

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