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Author Archives: Polar Coug (twitter @PolarCoug)

Like a Fridge over Maxine Waters

Maxine Waters

When you’re over-taxed Feeling broke When libs are in your face I will make them croak I’m your Axelrod When Plouffe gets rough And Gibbs just can’t be found Like a fridge over Maxine Waters I will chill you down Like a fridge over Maxine Waters I will chill you down When you’re Debbie Downer With Mayonnaise hair When brains ...

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You’ll be my ACORN, Libs of Squirrel

Gene Chandler - The Duke of Earl

  Look, look, look, there’s a squirrel Look, look, there’s a squirrel Look, look, there’s a squirrel Look, look, there’s a squirrel Look, look, there’s a squirrel Look, look, there’s a squirrel Look, look, there’s a squirrel As I walk through this election Nothing can stop my change of direction And you, you are my squirrel No one can elect ...

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Man of La Muncha

don-quixote-film

To eat a delicious dog hound To chew without making a sound To burp when the dog goes down greasy To run when dogs give you the runs. To  munch a Chihuahua for lunch To bite till the Dane’s out of sight To digest when your tummy is weary To tax when the dogs are all white. This is my ...

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Took away Her White Man’s Life, Savory Crabs and her Butter Knife

Elizabeth Warren

They took 1/32nd of the Harvard Nation And put Warren on their reservation Took away her white man’s life Savory crabs and her butter knife They took away her hot crossed buns Her omelettes gave them all the runs Mayonnaise and a can of Spam Pow Wow Chow ain’t her Uncle Sam Harvard Law people, Harvard Law tribe So proud ...

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Mitt will win and then we’ll Barry you

Ireland-Obama-007

Oh Barry boy, the votes, the votes are calling From dead to dead and down Chicago’s way The summer’s gone and all the ballots dying ‘Tis you, ’tis you must go and Mitt must stay But come ye hack when Plouffe cries in his pillow Or when your campaign’s broke and out of blow And I’ll be here when Al ...

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He gave her Vacations and Some Buns of Steel. . . She was proud of Her Time on The Hill

Cab-Calloway-Minnie-The-Mooche-397493

Folks, here´s a story about Michelle the Moocher She was a Chicago red hoochie-koocher She was the roughest, toughest frail But Michelle had a butt as big as a wha-a-le Hidee-Hidee-Hidee-hi Hodee-hodee-hodee-ho Heedey-hee-dee-hee-dee hee Hidee-hidee-hidee-ho She messed around with a Barry named Obama She loved him though he was more like her mama He took her down to Choomtown He ...

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When the Tingle’s Gone and You Can’t go on, It’s Tragedy

chooming

  Here I lie in a lost and lonely D.C. town Biden time In a world of polls I slowly drown Goin’home I can’t take elections all alone I really should be taxing you Taxing you Chooming you chooming you Tragedy When the tingle’s gone and you can’t go on It’s tragedy When your Holder cries and you don’t know ...

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He’s a Dog Eater

♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ ♪ ♫ Sung to the tune of “She’s a Man Eater” by Hall & Oates He’ll only eat out at night, The lean and hungry type, No hound is new, I’ve seen him eat before. Watching and waiting, He’s eating with you but his eyes are on the floor. So many have paid to see, The ...

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Plouffe the Campaign Dragon

David Plouffe

♩ ♪ ♫ ♬ Plouffe, the campaign dragon lived for TV And frolicked with his campaign staff in a land called Make Believe, Little Barack Obama loved that rascal Plouffe, And brought him cash and ACORN nuts and other fancy stuff. Oh! Plouffe, the campaign dragon lived for TV And frolicked with his campaign staff in a land called Make ...

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Fighting the Leftists’ Secret Combination

The late Ezra Taft Benson, Secretary of Agriculture during the Eisenhower Administration, spoke out frequently on the subject of a secret combination that was striving to overthrow our society with the aim of taking total control over all men everywhere. He warned that organized crime was ubiquitous throughout our society; terrorists, drug gangs, various Mafias, and bloody tyrants. But he ...

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Night at The Barrys

“Am I at Sears— in the Craftsman Department? There sure seem to be a lot of liberal tools here today. “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen! My name is Al Gore and I approve of this massage! We are gathered here tonight for this auspicious inaugural presentation of The Barrys, the premiere annual awards ceremony of the world’s leftist movement—and I ...

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Frankly Barney, You Won’t Be Missed

When I learned Cong. Barney Frank (D–Libertine) was retiring after 30 years in the House, my first thought was don’t let the door hit you in the behind. That’s because Frank personifies everything that’s wrong with the political class currently infesting our nation’s capitol. Frank is morally, politically and ethically corrupt. This Democrat party leader helped produce a nation that’s ...

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Green Libs and Rahm

I am Bam. I am Bam. Bam I am. That Bam-I-am! That Bam-I-am! I do not like that Bam-I-am! Do you like green libs and Rahm? I do not like them, Bam-I-am. I do not like green libs and Rahm. Would you like them on Wall Street? I would not like them on Wall Street. I would not like them ...

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Never trust a Vegetable: Not even Joe Biden

So, there’s good old Joe Biden, swimming in a sea of Testosterone, shouting to the world that the Republicans’ opposition to Barack the Wonderful’s jobs bill is going to be the catalyst for more rapes in America. Now doesn’t that just hack your Weiner? Stand up, Joe, let ‘em see ya! Well, not all of ‘ya, just the part that ...

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Obama is full of Schmidt

Obama. The very word tends to remind the sane among us of a dirty word – that which we would rather not utter. For the scarce conservatives in the Hollywood set it is shades of Harry Potter and “he who shall not be named.” For the elitist snobs stuffing Grey Poupon-soaked finger foods up their haughty snouts it is reminiscent ...

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